Distances

     My life has come quite a ways in the past week or two.  A few things I have noticed and I can't stand at times.  I try to keep myself as normal as possible and keep things together.  I know at some point I complained at how some people in life are so used to be given things in their life and I thought on that quite a bit today.  
     I can't really talk when it comes to being given things.  I have had so many things and joys in my life that have been given to me.  Some of them I really didn't deserve.  The biggest thing I think about is Amber.  Amber was something that I have always loved, she was just such a nice mare when I went up to ride her I was envious of such a nice mare but I knew she was loved.  Each time she mentioned selling her I knew it would be hard, not only for her but for me knowing she was a nice mare.  Now I feel like someone else that's clingy and whiny and just want things that you cannot afford.  That was me with Amber.

     She's so calm and relaxed and she already knows a lot more of her stuff.  I still love Heidi but as I feared would happen it would hit a stand still without some kind of trainer.  I am hoping I can advance enough with Amber to the point of possibly showing her later this fall and then start bringing Heidi back along behind her.  She's so calm and content.  I don't know why but She's just, helps to ground me.  Maybe it's just something that gives me a loving feeling from a friend that never really lets me down.  I'm hoping that things will start to fly right soon.  Got a couple job leads to work on some more.  I can't wait to be actually completely stable on my own with my girls.  

I don't think I could even begin to imagine life without them.