Sunday, April 29, 2018

Always


Well been a little while again and I was doing good mentally for a while but this past weekend has put my heart to the test.  I ran out of Eddie's hay that I had been feeding all winter so I thought, I will just have to get some of Harry's if he is interested in selling his rolls again.  I knew that his hay had given them sores in their mouths last year but I totally forgot to think that it was the rainiest February in the written history of Kentucky and these are outside stored bales.  The girls would not eat it at all.  So I was down to the fact of they need to go to another field.  I know the field across the road isn't an option because his dog is not good with livestock and it's a jack russel.  He was afraid it would go nip the horses and since it's small and white, Heidi would try to stomp it into the turf.  Only option I can think of to help my pasture was to take the horses off.  At least Tessa is quiet and calm so I asked to move her to Lisa's.  I hated doing it.  I know she's fine over there, but I hated separating my girls.  Heidi is moping around here by herself.  I am trying to not cry knowing my middle fur-child is not here anymore.  I feel like it's first steps to selling her or something.  Push her away and forget about her.  I'm afraid and I seriously miss her.  



She seemed to really like being out there.  She got a little bloody spot on her butt and on her forehead but I think that came from when the cut gate came and locked her into the front of the trailer.  I didn't think to check that first.  She was still really good to trailer despite being almost a year and a half without seeing a trailer again.  It's on my list of things to get- a trailer, but for now it's a pipe dream. 




Heidi is moping around being alone.  I left her out to graze the backyard for over an hour today.  I feel so awful, I just feel like she's going to hate me for taking away her buddy again.   I hope the grass comes up under her quickly and I can get the fence repairs done around her.  

As for the rabbits.  They are doing good.  I had tried to put Gerdy, Natalie and Connie in the x-pen together and they all dug out under it.  So they are all in cages again until I can build an actual pen and put wire down on the ground to prevent the digging out.  I have a few rabbits that need to go out the door to create room and this time I think sadly, Trick is going to be one of them.  He has several nice babies in Linds' nest box.  I like Trick but he's not proving himself to be a good brood buck.  He shows okay but being a blue buck he needs to be really good.  I'm not sure Mirror took to him for another litter.  Her first litter was all charlie and sports, not a single marked kit from Trick.  Cricket to Trick gave me 1 marked kit, 3 sports and 3 charlies. 

These are Linds babies.  I'm waiting to see how these babies grow out and what is a doe and what isn't.  The lilacs are heavier marked so with any luck they will be does.  Heavy bucks go to Marty.  The blue I also hope is a doe because I want another blue doe.  
The dutch are doing okay, Fist is going to go to Amy eventually, and I am hoping to cull out Legend after her litter to Fist since her daughter, Memory, is better typed and has a Willie litter in the box right now with a few good looking kits.  I need to watch their body types first.  I have to cut back the number I have.  I still haven't gotten to where I can cull Natalie and Connie.  

As for my health.  I switched vitamins again yesterday.  I had taken my GNC one at lunch like normal but after getting to Lisa's she brought me over the doTerra book and showed me a little clip on Hashimoto's and had a spare bottle of one of the vitamin's it recommends so I took one with dinner.  It's recommends that you take 4 a day but I figure if I start with 2 a day and keep going I should be pretty good.  So now I take one of those plus my HBP pill with lunch and another vitamin and a zyrtec with dinner.  So far today I actually feel pretty good.  I may have to go back to the Coburn farms yogurt as this Activia doesn't do what I want it to do.  Other than the mind games my lack of ability to take care of my own horses is taking on me and lack of ability to lose any weight has taken but it will come, I know it will.  I am still dreaming of the day that I will have both mares together again, and have my own little place again.  Dreams, Heidi, Tessa and Willow are what keeps me alive and going each and every day.