Breathe and Relax

     I know I blew my top two days ago when my car almost broke down.  The car is down for a little while anyway but I was so angry- I've cooled off since then but it's still highly frustrating that I keep putting more work into it and just not paying anything off yet.  The job fair I had anticipated going to last Saturday was a bust because the job fair was Friday not Saturday.  So emailed the resume in, and even have an employee reference in there so maybe that can give me a little boost and I can get out of Boonesboro.  It's not that I hate working there but I need the money offered by Alltech to get part of my life back.  I'm hoping with the higher pay I will be able to catch back up on my bills, and even move forward, get Willow's AKC number for Rally, get her showing, get Heidi trained and even get her jumping.  It's going to mean going back to 12 hour shifts, but they aren't so bad if they are set up correctly.  
     The car, it pissed me off so bad.  I am VERY happy that I calmed back down by the time Cathryn got there.  I hated blowing up the way I did at Lisa's-where the car still sits- but I just didn't handle it well at all.  Mostly because I couldn't take anymore.  Now I owe dad $32 for the new drive belt.  If I don't get this other job then I'm going to highly consider selling the car and getting a different one.  If I can at least get this job I'll hang onto the car and just keep fighting to keeping it running. I am really ready considering playing the lotto and praying to win.  
     Willow's actually coming along quite well, she did really well at the show going to watch.  I think the March show she'll be tagging along as a spectator again as I won't have her AKC number by then to show with, I just don't have the money.  I may put that on my credit card as well.  Gets it done and get's it ready to go.  I still don't think I'll be ready.Willow still has a ways to go on heeling before we can really compete.  I'm pushing on it as best as I can but it's just going to take me a little longer.  
     Heidi's been awesome.  After the dog show on Saturday I tacked up late for a late ride with Shana and Erika and Heidi was great.  She was extremely tired when we got done for I had never ridden her late or after dark.  It was a LONG ride - touch over 2 hours, and it was well past dark.  I couldn't head down to the barn until Erika was ready because she had a head light on her helmet.  
     Tomorrow is a day off and after checking and taking care of my bunnies I will go up and take a ride on Heidi- not a terribly long one but a ride none the less, then if it's still decent temp wise out I will give Una a bath.  I hate the idea of falling in love with another horse that isn't mine but Una makes it hard.  She really has no human to love her and as part of my work board I am supposed to help take care of Perry's horses or the ones who's owners never really show up.  Like Una, and Thor aren't Perry's but on my list.  Misty, Mary, Cha-Cha, Pixie, TC and Bootsie are on the list as Perry's horses.  I think he even would like me to care for horses at the other barn which I don't know, Yet, where it is.  
     It's almost 10 pm and I'm exhausted.  It's time to let my mind sleep and rest.  Tomorrow's going to be a good day.  After bunnies is the horses, then Aunt Lisa's to chat with her and also Cathryn about the doTerra.