Rant to Trust

     Well what a wild three days, I got more of an insight to the two people I work with than I ever wanted to get.  I knew I didn't really trust Bishop from when he kept leaving me and the last time when he wouldn't give me a break before.  As far as I'm concerned he's a lazy bastard that plays on Ashley's soft side and is one of her favorites.  Right now I don't care what any of them think of me.  They've done all pissed me off.  Sunday started it  off.  I had mom make us brownies that I brought in for everyone.  Then Chris wanted me to train Terry.  I said no, training was not my job.  So I disappeared and went off to do my own things and help other people.  Then Monday, I told Aaron Johnson, from day shift that I took over for, that I had never done a washdown back there and he said he'd tell Chris to come back and help me.  I told him Chris wouldn't come back there, he insisted he would come back to help.  Well needless to say, I was right.  I hit the washdown, after two tag tests back to back with no breaks or nothing.  I had stopped for a bathroom break, and a couple minutes to get some water to drink.  I was already covered in sweat.  Then it was back to the washdown.  I got almost all of the washdown done, I was foaming I got half of the system foamed, and about ready to pass out from the heat when Jason and DJ came back.  DJ has been accused apparently by everybody in the Sauce room, to be a bully(for which HR, Shana and Joey will hear my displeasure on-you just don't put words in my mouth) so DJ wouldn't help but I think DJ pushed Jason to come back there and help me.  At least Jason bought me enough time to get out for a dinner break.  Needless to say, yes there's playing favorites- and I won't intend to ever trust people in there anymore.  
     I got back up to Heidi today.  It's so relaxing to sit up with her, I'm just going to probably pay for the rest of this month and if I can swing it financially, get July paid for and then bring her home.  I have to get Drifter vetted out first.  I'm kind of starting to enjoy having Drifter here.  I haven't done much with her, but to give Heidi a week or so off to let her finish healing up and I can start working Drifter some.  First step is getting her feet done.  
     I have one bunny going home tomorrow.  That should be exciting tomorrow.  No Heidi tomorrow.  I'll have to keep myself occupied here at home.  Shouldn't be a big deal at all.  I wish at times I was a pretty, thinner, good looking women that didn't have such a bad attitude and horrible temper so that one day I could be married with a nice little family and farm.  I have very low self esteem when it comes to finding a good man.  I'm so afraid of what I will find and I just don't feel comfortable going out into public.  I've become quite Hermit like.  Very Introvert.  Well tomorrow will come soon and I do have one rabbit going home, thankfully, but I have cages to clean and I need to go get a new battery for my scale tomorrow too.  I need to relearn how to trust people again, and trust myself to go out and just live a little again.