Equine Love

I have to say I haven't completely figured out my total fascination with horses when I look at my background.  I don't make the money to support them, but they have been my biggest fight to keep.  I have already started the sell out of my rabbits- albiet slowly but it's started.  I have every ounce of drive to keep them and I am already starting to look at summer plans for summer fielding for the two mares.  Heidi  is jealous of Tessa but Tessa's a much gentler lover than Heidi is.  I usually have to push Heidi away to be able to mess with Tessa.  I have been able to give both girls some good brushing and attention the past couple of days while it's been dry.  

 

I still haven't figured out why I was so driven to get Tessa back.  I have been trying and trying to figure it all out.  Something triggered it, and it wasn't seeing people and their Quarter Horses cause most of them didn't have Quarter Horses.  Mustangs, Morgans and Thoroughbreds really.  Something else set her into my mind and had me dreaming about her before I found her for sale.  

Now to rant just a little.  I wish I could find someplace that I could *trust* to take Heidi for a couple years and get her as far under saddle as Tessa is for me.  I know given a proper area and less MUD I could do it myself.  While I would LOVE to have them both at either Tamarack or at Lucky Charm to work on them and ride more I know it's not in my budget in anyway shape or form.

I have allowed my rabbits to fall to the way-side.  Part of me doesn't want to give them up- at least not the Dutch.  I have gotten a firm re-start but I now lack the time to go to shows and actually work on them solidly.  Breeding just for a few litters a year is STUPID.  I thought about keeping them just for raising a couple meat litters a year out of but we don't eat much rabbit ourselves.  Personally I'm not that big a fan of it.  

I've had a few places- well people- contact me about apartments, all of them are 2 bedroom or bigger.  I don't know how much I can stress I ONLY want a 1 bedroom for me and Willow.  It got me thinking about those shed homes, or Micro houses again.  The one that I have the website for has a 1 bedroom place for around $60k- seems a tad bit too high and then there's the location to put one after that, along with Septic, water and electric run to it and the foundation.  I just feel I could have so much more to give to this if I didn't have my girls at all.  I will keep working on it.  I have to, I must.

Right now I *need* to find my way around things and I need to get my life moving forward.  I have the greatest parents and supportive family around me that I can possibly have.  They may not agree with me on some times but they do help and support me the best they can! 

Lightbulb has come on

So I have been doing a lot of reading lately because of so much problems of self worth is low.  I have actually even picked up a notebook and started to take notes on what I have been finding and a lot links through the hypothyroidism, including high blood pressure!  So now the research has begun to start finding ways to help it through natural ways.  Diet changes and everything like that, I am also going to look for vitamins suppliments that can help and I will be looking through my doTerra book as well so long as it's either dark or nasty outside since I want to be out there with the girls as much as possible.
I had hoped to have had the time by now to actually do something with Tessa but I haven't because of the weather.   I am going to aim to do something this afternoon before the rain comes back in but a lot of it will depend on if the rain actually holds off and how wet and nasty it still is by the time I get home after church.  I am making myself drive up to Winchester and go to church I haven't been in a long time and I was going to go last week but it was way too cold to leave Willow in the car.  For me the hardest part is leaving her in the car to deal with everything while I am gone.  I know she would much rather go inside with me and lay down next to my feet than to sit in the car but for now she must.
I sold one of my Velveteen Lops yesterday and it actually felt great.  It'll be one less rabbit to have to deal with as the winter progresses.  I firmly believe it's only going to get worse in February because January has been mild.  Yeah we had two nasty cold spells that forced my rabbits to dishes for water and me to cringe, gripe and complain about it but winter is no where near over.
Willow, gotta touch base with her as well, but she needs to start getting back out and working again.  She gets overly excited to go into stores, still doesn't like people touching her but she has also started to ignore me telling her things so I will also have to get her back under the gun and as soon as I free up some money I think a round or two worth of training classes will help give us the boost we need to get back to the shows this year.  I gave up the second half of the year as things were too hectic in my life and I don't want to give up.  I gave up dog training and showing to get my rabbits back into condition to show.  I can't do that. This year I am hoping if I can get Willow ready for some March or April Rally or Obedience shows, Mikey will have Boss of Xena ready too.  It'll be a really fun adventure.  Plus I can hopefully afford to start CGC training classes as I want to get Willow her CGC.  I know she's a timid dog to start with but she needs to get this in order to be ready for everything I throw at her in the years to come. I might add on to this tonight, or start a new one or just chill out and keep researching.

New ambitions for the Year

 This year started with a twist- Tessa came home again.  So things have changed in my life and I have no real direction in which I am heading. I have a few goals but right now no real set in stone plane.  Right now I am winging a few things.

After I got Tessa home I tried Heidi's saddle on her and I had a few people tell me that she was just too short for me to ride.  Michael even told me she would be fine, she just has a stronger but shorter back- the short back was one of the things that people had gotten into my head that got me to sell her to begin with.  Then I got to thinking and Kylie got me to remember Daisy (The buckskin paint) that I used to ride in College.  She was smaller than Tessa and just as short in back and we were fine.  In fact I want to eventually do the same things with Tessa that I did with Daisy.  I also want to get Heidi that far as well.  Being able to ride in just a rope halter is fantastic, I used to do it with Phoenix but he had YEARS of saddle and showing so a halter was just a halter.  

Someday I want to have the connection with Tessa that I used to have with Daisy.  I also want to get Heidi to that point as well.  It will mean time, I need to put the time and effort into them both.  

Even Michael's saddle goes as far back as mine did, granted it won't have the weight on it that my saddle will carry which is why I have to lose weight.  Plus add that to look at my figure on Daisy versus my fat ugly self on Tessa.  Also the guy that had bought Tessa, Joey, his saddle goes that far back as well, still not as heavy as I am but again, I have to get this worked on.  I am working on it.

I know a lot of what has to happen and even Pastor Lee wants me to get back to Winchester.  I am trying, but now it's more of a matter of getting two horses to boarding.  I don't know what kind of rent I would need for an apartment but I am not getting rid of either mare at this point.  Tessa is more down to earth and a very good ground where Heidi really, honestly, needs to be sent for some serious training whenever I get the money to do so.  I wish I could afford to board them both so I could have access to the arena and round pens.  

Rabbits are on their way out.  I have two of the 3 Velveteen Lops going this weekend, down point though is she wants the JR doe and the Sr buck.  The Sr doe is pregnant, she palpated positive today and she doesn't want her.   So I will have a litter of Vlop babies and the momma to eventually sell.   No nibbles on the English Spots yet.  I have given Raven through this weekend to finally breed again or she's done.  Clover's on the cull list and I honestly think that if Natalie doesn't breed this time I might go ahead and cull her as her weight has started the yo-yoing and I don't want her to suffer.  Legends and Hailey have both palpated positive, but Legends is a yearling and Hailey is the other 3 year old.  Time to cull down on the dutch.  I hate to cull my good show does but they are getting older and I will not let them get into bad shape.  

To think suffering part of me wants to move out of Kentucky.  I am tired of fighting and losing badly to my sinus'.  I don't want to leave Aunt Lisa or dad but I want to quit fighting the sinus'.