I don't know what's been going on with me the last week or so, just foul mood, snippy, angry and depressed since Willow's spay surgery. Saturday's ride on Heidi helped to lift my mood and then today with Willow being with me has been even better, then the wonderful pink scarf from Jenny at Heartland Sheltie Rescue. Lisa and mine's only thought was it was from me donating food and an x-pen and LIsa donates so much of her time and energy to helping what sheltie's she can do. I just wish one day I can do something like that, maybe not with Shelties, or even Aussies but maybe Labrador's. I still would love to have a Lab again some day.
I have wanted a companion, human companion for a while. It's been a long time that I've actually wanted someone, so this morning when I got up at 5:30 I started to cruise Craigslist personal ads. I actually saw one that was actually interesting. I'm toying with the idea of emailing it back and seeing what actually comes of it. Kylie talked me into joining Pond Of Fish so who knows. At least meet a few people and actually try.
Saturday I actually tacked up and rode Heidi. It was a gorgeous afternoon to ride. A bit windy but not too cold and not too hot either. Eventually I need to invest in some winter riding pants.
Still daydreaming about my own place and I have still yet to do anything about it. I know it's bad that I haven't started working on it, but tomorrow is certainly another day to step forward. I shall walk next door to the Shell station and get a newspaper and start. I'll have two more days of no Blake so I will be sketching at work. Tuesday I'm going to try and take both dogs with me to work. Ayden needs a recheck on his weight and if we get time I'll have Rex or Patrick take a look at his eye. It's getting all gunky again.
Between all the running around I did today and what Lisa was doing I didn't get the chance to talk to her. I'm trying to trade some of my extra's for a new bit and a girth for Heidi so we can ride again. I can't wait to get back up on her back and see how she rides again. I need to invest in some warmer riding pants though. it's getting really seriously chilly for me. I don't handle the cold anywhere near as well as I used to. I don't know why but I'm just a wimp.
I still dream heavily of being able to find a *real* man and get my own little place and farmlet and be able to keep a couple horses(Heidi and if I could wing it- Amber) and just be a peaceful homemaker. I don't care to work full time but I just want it to be something easy and stress free. Some place I don't have to worry about bosses and owners not trusting me. I just want to be able to do things again like I used to, even when I lived in NY. I made $12 an hour working Monday-Friday and occasional Saturdays at Bard and I was happy, life was good. I had friends I saw, hung out with and talked to on a more routine basis. Right now my two closes friends are Lisa and Sandy. That's where I go when I need to get away, I need to unwind. Either the barn or Aunt Lisa's. I don't know what's so different now compared to then. I'm not as young as I was then. Had I not chosen to move down here I wouldn't have Heidi and that's a big thing for me, and I wouldn't have that relationship with Dad's side of the family like I do now. Negative thing is the lacking relationship with Aunt Sheri and Uncle Dennis. I miss the weeks and weekends with them, letting my mind escape reality even if for a little while.
Willow's doing good, she stayed home all last week because she got a routine down and had no messes in the house, bad part, she doesn't really respond much to me now. Whereas at the clinic with me she had me all day. She's excited when I get home, but I don't know what kinds of bad habits or anything that she's picking up. It just drives me bonkers that she doesn't respond to me like she use to. Maybe just some more training work will help or something. She's not big on car rides so I have to get her over that.
I'm learning a few more things as I'm moving along, my introverted paths. I am quite a solitary person I realized. I never got around to calling the one apartment place but I will do it Saturday on my way to the barn to see Heidi. I hope this cold spell breaks by mid week next week I wasn't ready for this kind of cold as I'm sure a lot of folks weren't. I know Heidi wasn't. She wasn't fuzzy enough and was cold even with her rain sheet on so her midweight went on her. She was a lot more comfortable then.
Thinking of Heidi, I'm back to thinking neck threadworms on her and I'm going to put her on a rigorous deworming schedule and see if that works on putting the itchiness at bay. Between the deworming schedule, spirulina, garlic and winter coming it should put it down into remission and come spring keep her on a strong deworming schedule should keep her from getting it back again. It's not something that will ever go away, once they get them, they don't ever go away. Misty might have gotten it off of Heidi. The larvae migrate down to the ventral area- thus making them itchy and then a fly bites the larvae of infected horse, then bits an unaffected horse giving it to them- ie Misty. Dang it. Worst of all is there's no real way of knowing and no way of getting rid of it completely.
Just keeping up with the whole disaster of change, Willow's changed food again as well. I was mixing her original food with Blue Buffalo puppy and she kept trying to eat Ayden's, so I picked up the Puppy version of Ayden's and she wolfed it down. So Hill's Ideal Balance is her food. I'll pick up the adult version next May when she hits a year old and then pick up the buy 10 bags get one free series. Yeah it'll take a couple years to get the free bag since it has to be the bigger bag.
Well it's been super good lately, Willow did great over at Lisa's in the yard where she could run to her hearts content. I wish Luna would have run with her as I know Luna's FAST. Luna and Tinks could just run with her. She's fast and if I can get her trained to agility and I could do it myself she would excel. Also assuming she likes getting out into public. She stayed with Lisa, Jim and Dad while I ran to Tamarack to drop Heidi stuff off and try Lisa's saddle on her. I'm hoping and praying Willow's growth on her hind food goes away with the antibiotics that Rex gave her. I'm seriously hopeful. I've been making her drag her leash but leaving it on the ground.
I was contemplating buying one of those if it actually fit Heidi now that she has withers. Shockingly, it fits. Well, other than the girth being about a foot too short. Lisa told me not to buy another one that she'd sell hers a lot cheaper. Right now I just need to order a longer girth and probably a girth extender. I'll aim at Thursday to order those. Then I'll talk some more to Lisa other than some dog training tips, I'll see what Lisa wants for her saddle, this way I can start getting Heidi ridden again and get her going again.
I'm hoping Thursday to get some phone calls made and possibly visit/tour one apartment place. I need to get that in gear so I can get moved out and on my own.
With all the stuff going on I'm hoping to find a way to sell or even trade some of the extra horse stuff towards stuff I need. I intend to keep at least one of my water tubs, but I don't need both. My dual sets of feeders and tubs I intend to keep as well cause eventually I intend to get a second horse. At times I wish I made the money and didn't have a puppy to work with and I'd have gotten Amber from Kylie.
Well, hopefully I should have a more positive. Attitude has been good lately so hopefully keep going in that direction.
I'm so ready to move forward with life. I got some interesting information at work today. Willow and I had a bad day, the day before yesterday but we're moving on from it. She learned and I learned some more and we're moving on from it. I still can't wait until she's fully trained. I learned one of the women, that used to work at Boonesboro, got into training and showing her Basenji's, got a new job, does do dog training at her home. Hopefully, even with a 4 month old baby, she still does it. If I can get her to put some training into Willow and myself it would be so much easier. Then starting into showing would be interesting. Even if we never really make it into the show ring, I would at least like to get the training into her. She'd be a better companion in the long run for it.
I'm still waiting on a trailer ride for Heidi. Everyone that I know of doesn't have a trailer tall enough, and even those that I have emailed/called asking if they can transport most still can't for a couple weeks because of Keeneland November sales. *sigh* It's starting to get me crazy. I just want to get her over to Tamarack and that's where she's going to stay for as long as I can keep her there. Which will be until I get married(hehe, if ever!) and get my own mini farm to move her to. I'm hoping then to shortly either get another job, a new job that's higher paying or win the lotto(Which is the least likely). I'm seriously considering going back to english with her, but I want to try Lisa's saddle on her first this way if that fits then I'll just order one of those and work with that until I make the money to get a custom saddle ordered so it fits her no matter what.
I'm still aiming to one of these days get the phone numbers to some of the apartment places so I can start calling them and talking to them. Find a good priced 1 bed room that's pet friendly and get moved. I know it's going to be hard and interesting but it's a new adventure for me.
So today was beyond interesting. Gave me more insight to myself and where my priorities lay. I actually felt good, other than sleepy while running my day out. It felt amazingly good to not have Willow with me. I keep telling myself that maybe a dog wasn't the right thing for me right now. I have a super jealous horse, and still have a few rabbits left that need attention. Heidi even turned her back to me a couple times already. I feel guilty not spending time with Heidi. I know once Willow gets out of this puppy stage it'll be far easier to be able to leave her while I go to Heidi. If I do have come down to a choice, Heidi was first. I do love Willow very much, but she will also be far easier to rehome into a great home over Heidi. Willow was a bit of a hasty decision, while a wonderful addition I didn't think a lot of things through. I'm thinking them through now. Better late than never. Am I going to give up now? No. Not yet. Unless apartment living proves to be bad for her. I *am* going to keep moving ahead with the apartment choice. It's what I need to move forward with my life.
On the flip side, Willow's learning in leaps and bounds. I have found her favorite spot to poddy and she does tell me when she needs to go. She's got more energy than I really want. Again probably the puppy aspect of her life right now. Hopefully she settles quickly. I don't think I have the energy to keep up with a puppy right about now. Maybe she was the wrong choice in breed. Who knows. I'm with it for the long haul right now. Shortest lived buyers remorse hopefully. I know I had no regrets at all when I decided to buy Heidi. I do wonder why I am having them with Willow. Maybe I'm just not the kinda person to have a dog, I'm more of a horse person? I just don't know.
Flipping channels once again, Heidi's been good actually. I think I have pinned her itchiness down to Rice Bran. I went to soaking the pellets to put the garlic and antihistamine's in and I haven't *Knock on wood* seen her itch since then. I did however already pull her sheet out and she's had it on since Friday evening. I'm going to take it off today though. She just doesn't have the fur coat quite yet that she needed for snow. She's ready to go back to Tamarack now to just get her a ride. I'll call one of those numbers that Sandy gave me that can haul and hopefully it's not too expensive and we shall aim for Thursday this week. I kinda can't wait for her to get back to Tamarack. It's where she was happiest and this helps me with my idea of moving towards Winchester.
